so explain again why im purple
no
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
