I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Sorry about my life...
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