I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
