Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
