I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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