would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize