Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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