I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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