two words: eviction party
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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