So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i jhust puked up my retainher.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
