you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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