seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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