Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
