she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
