so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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