she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
