bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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