Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
ugly people sure do ruin things
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
