she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
