I wish I only lived at night.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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