our cab driver is having phone sex.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
