I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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