i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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