her vagine was all disorganized.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
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