Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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