She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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