i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
