TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
We need to get me chipped asap
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
