i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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