Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
But break dance skills will only take you so far
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
