just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just gift wrapped bread.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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