Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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