Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
