No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
