I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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