Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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