please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
