Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
