The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You dont lie about slip and slides
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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