either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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