You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
