let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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