I want to stick my p in your. b.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
