what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
40s are totally the cure
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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