Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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