think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
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