she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
