She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
only you would photoshop your dick
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
