what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize