found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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