sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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