They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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